a love story

Dear…

I learned that you are in a deep emotional dilemma right now. I was told that you are having a hard time making the right choices, portraying and acting on the role that people told you to act, and balancing your personal and social life. In all of these emotional turmoil you are going through, you feel really alone.
You believe that you are no longer happy with your work. You wanted a way out! you wanted to explore, to go places where you can be invisible and yet so loud, to be idle and think nothing about what the future has for you. You even wanted to change places with people whom you believe have a simple and non-complex lives. Please don’t be too hard on yourself. Maybe the competition in your work is getting into your nerves that you wanted to chill out. I understand this. However, I believe that getting away out will never be of good. I suggest that you get back to your old habit of having a monthly getaway. I know that looking forward unto something will make you feel better. Have a more time for yourself. Pamper yourself. You deserve wherever you are right now. you worked pretty hard for it, don’t you remember? Don’t waste it!

They also told me that you are immensely tired of pleasing other other people, that the pressure they toll on you is already freaking you out. I am positive that you can get away with it. I have known you as someone who does not care about what other people have to say about you. Remember, you even told me that a happy life is all about living with your own standards. You inspired me when you said that you will be completely happy with your life as long as you are not stepping unto others’ toes, you show respect, you are sensitive, and that you do good towards others. I have made these as among of my principles in life. I have known you as someone who believes in what is right, who does not live just to fit in, who wants to make a difference in a little way you can, who wanted to help, who believes in advocacy. I want to see that person. Do not let them enslave you. Get up!

I understand that you are also having a hard time thinking and weighing in the situation you are into with someone. You are in quandary comprehending when and how your journey with that someone will end, coding and decoding the significant and less significant questions and answers that are flowing through your mind, trying to unravel a more concrete and visible answers. BUT OF NO AVAIL. You don’t know if you are still important and loved by that someone, if both of you will still play as major actors in doing the most significant roles in your future, or if that someone still thinks and longs for a future with you. Sadly, all that you can see now is gray; blank. You still have hopes but that hopes weakens whenever the sad realities start sinking in. I understand that you don’t want someone to live in your terms, hence you never impose, you never ask, you remain composed. You opted to keep things to your self. You were always so giving.

You know that I love you and I do not want to see you hurting. I do not want you to feel that way. It pains me to see you emotionally wrecked and distressed. I believe that it is best for you to start thinking about yourself. Do not be pleased by the simple joys that  that someone is conferring on you. You know for a fact that after all those little showers of laughter, showers of tears will definitely run through your checks. You have waited long enough for that “someone” to figure out the entirety and reality of your worlds. However, he failed, he remained mum about it. Even a slightest ray of light never shed. So, get back to your senses, “pack” yourself and start moving forward. You are blessed because you have the entire support and encouragement of your family and friends. You are equipped with the lessons you have learned in your life which will help you on your journey and I know you will never fall that high again.

I hope I have helped you.

My prayers are with you.

Love….